Appeasement

I hate confrontation.

I have no desire to argue with the airline that left my suitcase in Perth two days ago, now containing stinking spoiled Kosher hotdogs and “off” yoghurt that I bought for a Chabad Rabbi living in Adelaide. Or course, I should pluck up the courage and demand compensation for the damage caused by their incompetence.  It is surely problematic, in the grand scheme of things, to support the fight against the most evil but be too squeamish to fight ourselves[1]. I wonder what our tradition teaches us about appeasement vs. standing up and fighting. Some Jewish teachings for and against appeasement can be found in the case of Jacob’s humble or humiliating approach to his brother Esau[2], twenty years after having tricked their father to give him the blessings originally intended for Esau[3].

The Scene

Jacob had escaped to Haran when Easu’s thoughts turned to murdering him as soon as Isaac died[4]. Despite twenty years passing. Jacob was still afraid of Esau’s anger. He send messengers telling them exactly what to say to my master Esau. He is so keen to flatter Esau’s ego that he models subservience to his messengers[5], to be sure that the posture is absolutely clear to them[6]. By custom the first born was treated almost like a parent, when Jacob repeatedly refers to Esau as “my master” he implies that he completely relinquishes his claims to the right of the first born that Esau had sold him for a pot of lentils[7]. It brings to mind a snide comment about Jewish-Palestinian dialogue, “they accuse, we apologise”. My limited observations and experience of this dialogue is that it is about seeking to understand each others stories and experiences, yet the comment reflects the reluctance to give any ground in pursuit of positive relationships.

One View. “God: Jacob was wrong”

One classic source has God saying to Jacob “you lowered yourself by referring to Esau as my master eight times, by your life!, I will raise up 8 kings among the descendents of Esaue before your children will have any kings[8]. In another source[9]

 God is upset about Jacob’s submissiveness, because “I said the older will serve the younger”[10].  

Long Term Damage of Appeasement or Is that of Assertiveness?

A later commentary sees a sign of things to come in Jacobs’ deference to Esau for what would happen in subsequent generations. We began our own defeat by the Edom/Rome because of the Hasmonean kings seeking a pact with the Romans[11].

While seeking the favour of the Romans might have started our defeat. It was in fact the reckless, extremist, pedantic standing up to Rome that sealer our fate. One case related to the custom that when a boy was born they would plant a cedar tree and when a girl was born to plant a pine tree, and when they married, the tree was cut down and a canopy made of the branches. One day the daughter of the Emperor was passing when the shaft of her litter broke, so they lopped some branches off a cedar tree and brought it to her. The Jews thereupon fell upon them and beat them[12]. In another case, a sacrifice offering from the emperor was rejected on a technicality. In the end when the Romans laid siege to Jerusalem the guidance of the sage Rabbi Yochanan Ben Zakkai was ignored, instead a desperate and futile battle was fought by tiny Judea against Rome[13].  

Alternative View

The same source that  brings us critical views of Jacob also offers an opposite perspective[14]. Rabbi Judah the President[15], said to his secretary Rabbi Efes, “write a letter from me to the master, the King Antoninus (Pius?[16]). So Efes wrote a letter and signed it from Judah the President to the Master King Antoninus. Rabbi Judah took the letter, read it and tore it up. “Write to the master, King Antoninus from Judah your servant”. Effes replied ,but Rabbi, why are you degrading your honour. Rabbi Judah told him, “how am I better than my grandfather (Jacob) who said so shall you say to my master Esau. Another source also praised Jacob’s humility[17].

The Argument continues in the Aftermath of a Bloodbath

The merits of assertiveness and even aggression vs. appeasement plays out even more dramatically after Jacob’s sons kill the whole city of Shchem in revenge for the rape of their sister Dina. Jacob is concerned about the repercussions of this violence, but his sons assert, “Should they make our sister into a prostitute?![18]”  Jacob is silent in the face of this emotive, battle cry retort. What was he supposed to say, “yes, I think it doesn’t matter that my daughter and your sister was raped”. Only years later at the end of Jacobs life does he curse their anger and show disapproval again about this episode[19].

Conclusion

The wisdom of the ages tells us that there are pitfalls with appeasement, yet there is also great wisdom in it. Neville Chamberlain’s portrait can hang on the walls of all war enthusiasts because of his role in discrediting appeasement. Yet, I would argue that not every trigger happy, evil, despotic nut-job is a Hitler. I guess, I should fight with the airline for my money, but more broadly, careful consideration of the pros and cons of each choice is needed.

“Everything has an appointed season, and there is a time for every matter under the heaven… A time to kill and a time to heal; a time to break and a time to build… a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing... a time to keep and a time to cast away… a time to be silent and a time to speak…A time to love and a time to hate; a time for war and a time for peace[20].

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[1] Judah L Magnes, a leading Pacifist during WWI. Wrote to Ghandi in 1939, “ I know I would pray with all my heart for the defeat of the Hitler inhumanity; and am I then to stand aside and let others do the fighting? During the last war I prayed for a peace without defeat or victory. The answer given by Romain Rolland in his little book Par la revolution la paix (1935), seems to be, that while he himself as an individual continues to refuse to bear arms, he will do everything he can to help his side (in this case, Russia) to win the war. That is hardly a satisfying answer.” http://www.gandhiserve.org/information/writings_online/articles/gandhi_jews_palestine.html#Letter from Judah L. Magnes to Gandhi, February 26, 1939

[2] Genesis 32:4-33:15

[3] Genesis 27

[4] Genesis 27:41, Esau either delayed his plan to kill Jacob out of his respect for his father, or perhaps did not want to repeat the mistake of Cain, who still had to split his inheritance despite the murder of Abel because their father had another son Seth. (Targum Yonatan Ben Uziel)

[5] Ramban

[6] Ibn Ezra

[7] Ramban

[8] Beresheet Rabba 75:2

[9] Daat Zekainim Mebaalei Hatosafot

[10] Genesis 25:23

[11] Ramban

[12] Talmud Gittin 57a

[13] http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/biography/ben_zakkai.html

[14] Beresheet Rabba 75

[15] often referred to as Rabbi Judah the prince, in Hebrew it is Rabbi Judah Hanasi, probably better translated as president than prince.

[16] “A. Mischcon, Abodah Zara, p.10a Soncino, 1988. Mischcon cites various sources, "SJ Rappaport... is of opinion that our Antoninus is Antoninus Pius." Other opinions cited suggest "Antoninus" was Caracalla, Lucius Verus or Alexander Severus”. See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antoninus_Pius#cite_note-30

[17] Mishnat Rabbi Eliezer parsha 10, 182

[18] Genesis 34

[19] Genesis 49:5

[20] Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Purity is over-rated! On leaving “moral home”: Vayetze

I found the Australian Peter Slipper drama really interesting but I am not game to comment on that. More broadly it is an opportunity to discuss  questions about integrity. Here are my thoughts.

To compromise my beliefs and values, even for a good aim is wrong, is dangerous and would destroy me. Keeping faith with those who trust me is a matter of the highest priority and a religious obligation. Yet, there are low-priority spiritual preferences and ideals that I  think I should sacrifice. I was raised on the Chabad² idea of leaving our spiritual home neighbourhood to reach out to less religious Jews. In my current role, I had a school principal tell me that  she would be more impressed with our message of harmony³  if “it wasn't a business”, clearly if no money was involved our moral message would be purer, for the small number of people who hear it. However, by accepting money for my educational work, I am able to devote all the time I would need to spend on feeding my family to the noble cause I care about. Less pure, but more practical and more benefit created.

Jacob, the wholesome man, dragged “crying and bent” by his mother into his first act of deception, leaves the holy land, his holy parents' home and ventures out to badlands of Aram. First he stops and prays⁴. He surrounds his head with rocks, either to protect himself practically, or it is suggested to set hard boundaries around his mind, to protect it from getting too involved with matters threatening his spiritual purity⁵. Then he dreams, of divine angels, and wakes up to declare, wow! God was in this place, and I did not know it. He learns to find God in this most unlikely of places⁶. He further tries to protect himself, making a deal with God and erecting a tangible rock monument of his commitment. Then he plunges in.

His step is light, he is said to be carrying his legs⁷, confident in God's protection, clear in his purpose, spirit in the pilots seat, unlike people facing uncertainty where their “legs carry them”.

He puts up a good fight. On arrival he speaks out against shepherds who seem to be cheating their employer, “the day is still long, it is not time to gather the flocks, give your sheep some drink and go take your sheep to pasture⁸.” Overflowing with enthusiasm, he works for 7 years for the right to marry the beautiful woman he loves, but it feels like a few days in his love for her⁹. The shine starts to come off, when he is duped by his uncle Laban into marrying Leah, the sister of his beloved. He is then given a verbal kick by his cruel uncle/now father-in-law, “it is not done this way in our place, to give the younger before the older”. Laban's implication is that 'we are not like you, the younger brother, who usurps his older brothers Esau's blessings', we are better than that ¹⁰. Jacob must work another 7 years to marry Rachel in addition to Leah.

We are told that Leah was “hated¹¹” by Jacob, perhaps he suspected her motives in deceiving him when he saw signs of barrenness in her.¹² His anger, eventually flares up with Rachel after she is jealous of her sister having children, and she demands “give me children, otherwise I will die”. A 13^th century commentator, suggests that Rachel talked “in the way of longing of beloved women to scare him with her death¹³”. Jacob tells his wives, Laban's daughters, that he was swindled by their father Laban “changing the work agreement ten times”. He engages in creative practices to try get a fair deal, and eventually runs away from Laban, who pursues him and heaps more criticism on Jacob, “what did you do?!...leading my daughters as captives of the sword¹⁴”.

Yet, Jacob, later named Israel, succeeds in the end, raising a family with 13 children loyal to his values and way of life, he even keeps faith with Laban whom he serves loyally and with great integrity, as he tells Laban "by day scorching heat consumed me, and frost by night; my sleep drifted from my eyes" in his work caring for Laban's sheep. Jacob ends his life with his best days surrounded by great grandchildren and his descendants are known as the “children of Israel”.

"It is not the critic who counts:

not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles

or where the doer of deeds could have done better.

The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,

whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood,

who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again,

because there is no effort without error or shortcoming,

but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions,

who spends himself for a worthy cause;

who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement,

and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly,

so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls

who knew neither victory nor defeat."

Theodore Roosevelt, 1910

2 Chabad, is a Jewish religious movement and tradition that encourages adherents to leave religious enclaves for the purpose of promoting Torah generally, it's spiritual teachings and related practices.

3 www.togetherforhumanity.org.au

4 Rashi on Genesis 28:11

5 The Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi MM Schneerson (1964), Likutei Sichot Volume 1, Vayetze p.61.

6 Michelle, M. Parent of a girl with Cerebral Palsy, in remarks celebrating her daughters successful Bat Mitzvah.

7 Genesis 29:1, Rashi and Seforno

8 Genesis 29:7

9 Genesis 29:18

10 Nechama Lebovitz

11 Genesis 29:31, following literal text, Oonkelus, Ohr Hachayim, Seforno, Targum Yonatan “she was not loved”

12 Seforno

13 Ramban (born 1194- 1270) on Genesis 30:1

14 Genesis 31:26