Darkness is Light and Liberating

I learned a remarkable teaching the other day relating to the dark times in our lives and the plague of darkness in ancient Egypt. “Darkness” - deep discomfort - is necessary for breaking free. Contrary to the idea that religion is the opium of the masses, and that spiritual practice should make us feel good, in the short term, is the simple truth that growth requires some discomfort.

Our lives take on familiar patterns. Comedian Jim Carey struggled with depression, despite his fame and success. Reflecting on his experience, he said,” depression is your body saying it had enough” [he used more colourful language.] ”…I don’t want to be this character anymore. I don’t want to hold up this avatar that you created in the world. It’s too much for me”. His point is that it’s totally pointless to spend our whole lives creating and curating an identity for ourselves. This is all propping up our ego: desiring to be important, to be someone, to ‘matter’[i].

To be free, from a spiritual and emotional perspective, is to realise our potential and be oriented to, and focused on, our purpose rather than our ‘brand’ and others’ perceptions of us[ii]. The Talmudic sages stated, “there is no one who is free, other than one who is occupied with the Torah[iii]”.

From Chasidic/Kabbalist and allegorical perspectives, the ten plagues that were inflicted on the Egyptians at the time of the exodus were powerful forces that contributed to spiritual liberation[iv].

Of all the ten plagues, only one - darkness - was so important that it is predicted to be repeated, for fifteen days, during the final redemption by the Messiah[v]. It struck me as odd; how can darkness be critical for positive transformation?

This can be understood when we consider that circumstances experienced as light and pleasure by one person can be experienced as darkness and a plague by another. Moses initiated the plague of darkness by extending his hands over the heaven[vi]. This represents a flow of spiritual energy down into the land of Egypt. For people who were already tuned into spirituality, this was delightful and ‘light’, however for those who were oriented towards decadence and cruelty, this same situation was alienating and uncomfortable or ’dark‘. In other words, there is no greater hell than the experience of a wicked person put in a spiritual paradise[vii].

My takeout from this is that, in seeking to negotiate my relationship with God and personal growth, perseverance is needed when something doesn’t immediately click and doesn’t feel right. It might be because it is out of my comfort zone rather than because ‘it is not for me’. 

According to tradition, during the plague of darkness, any Jewish people who did not wish to leave Egypt died[viii]. This will also be the case for those in future who will not want to leave the state of exile[ix]. This represents the agony that can be experienced with significant change. Experiences of ‘darkness’ invite us to reflect on the choice between growth and stagnation, and a kind of death. We are forced to ask ourselves ‘are we willing to give up, or do we have the fight in us?’ Is the pain of growth unbearable? The answer must be “I will not die, but live[x]!”

 This theme plays out again when the Israelites encountered bitter water that became sweet when a stick was thrown in[xi]. This story reiterates the same message - the unfamiliar water that initially appeared bitter was revealed as being sweet after a bit of discomfort. Bitter can be the other side of the coin to sweet, as darkness can be to light[xii]. 

It has been said that “breakdown is often breakthrough[xiii]”. The dark times in our lives can be like having “fallen down a ravine, falling into the gap between who you are and who you want to be[xiv]”.

 

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[i] https://www.elephantjournal.com/2017/11/jim-carrey-explains-depression-in-the-best-way-ive-ever-heard/

[ii] Lowenthal, T, https://www.chabad.org/parshah/article_cdo/aid/2754/jewish/Freedom-in-Five-Dimensions.htm

[iii] Pirkey Avot 6:2

[iv] The Zohar cited in https://www.chabad.org/parshah/article_cdo/aid/819472/jewish/Fire-and-Ice.htm and Schneerson, Rabbi M.M, in Likutei Sichos vol 1, Vaera

[v] The Zohar, cited in Chida on the Chumash, Shemot, p. 89. Note also Isaiah 60:2

[vi] Exodus 10:21

[vii] Yaakov Yosef of Polnoah, one of the Chasidic masters, in Toldos Yaakov Yosef, parshas Bo, p. 148

[viii] Shmos Rabba, 14:3

[ix] The Zohar, cited in Chida as cited above

[x] Psalms 118:17

[xi] Exodus 16:23-25

[xii] Yaakov Yosef of Polnoah, p. 147

[xiii] Laing, R.D. in Haig, M, (2015), Dear Stranger, Letters on the Subject of Happiness, Penguin Books, p. 34

[xiv] Haig, M, (2015), Dear Stranger, Letters on the Subject of Happiness, Penguin Books, p. 34