Selling Young Daughters into Servitude and Marriage in the Torah

Long after I closed the book the words played on my mind. I read a passage in the Torah about the case of a man who sells his daughter as a child to be a maidservant. When the girl matured, she would be expected to marry her master, marry her master’s son, failing either of these options s

he would go free[i]. This was disturbing enough, but a 13th-century commentary by Rabbi Yitzchak Ben Araama added some colour to this. He wrote that the father could go ahead with such a sale even if it is to a “repulsive man, stricken with leprosy, and the daughter is screaming there is no justice [in the world], there is no Judge[ii]”- an allusion to God, in whom she can no longer believe after what has been done to her.

This disturbing law, and passage really got my attention. So, I did two things, I started to read what I could in my library and what I could find online and I put a call out on Facebook to see if anyone else could shed light on this. Both strategies bore fruit.

We must first ask the question; is this scenario one the Torah condoned or a practice the Torah tolerated but condemned and restricted. It would appear to be the latter.

The Torah stated that if this arrangement did not transition into a fully-fledged marriage – with all the rights of a wife as required by the Torah- then the girl must be set free. She cannot be sold again, after ‘he had betrayed her[iii]’. According to one interpretation, this is referring to the father who betrayed his daughter by selling her in the first place[iv]. While it is jarring to us that the Torah does not forbid the practice outright, it does appear to condemn it.

The Torah does not say anything about requiring consent from the girl – who as a child could not meaningfully consent anyway. However, the written Torah is meant to be read together with the oral tradition to be understood[v]. A friend[vi] on Facebook directed me to the work of Maimonides on Jewish law, which requires the girl’s consent for marriage when she becomes mature[vii]. Another commentator adds that if the father is a “kosher’-proper person the sale should not go ahead in the first place without the daughter’s agreement[viii]. 

Maimonides – based on the Talmud[ix] - also stipulated that a father is only permitted to sell his daughter if he became so poor that he has absolutely nothing, he does not even own the garment he is wearing[x]. The context of this practice is unimaginable poverty in an economic reality that is very different from ours[xi]. It has been argued that in such a context it was merciful for a girl to escape unbearable poverty and become a ‘lady’ in a more affluent home[xii].

All of this needs to be viewed within the larger context of Judaism that contains insistent messages about the obligations of the strong toward the week [xiii].

None of this sits comfortably with me. The idea that the Torah would tolerate such a terrible deed still disturbs me. However, with further study, I recognize that there is more nuance than first meets the eye. I hope that as people with different beliefs and backgrounds meet each other and are confronted with ancient texts we respond with curiosity and not knee-jerk condemnation.

 

Thank you to Rabbis Ben Elton, Chayim Lando, Eli Cohen and Shimon Eddi and many others for your help

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[i] Exodus 21:7-11

[ii] Yitzchak, Ben Arama, - (c. 1420 – 1494) Spain, in Akeidat Yitzchak, on book of Leviticus, gate 67, p.119, it is beyond the scope of this short post but it must be pointed out that this passage in gate 67 is in the context of making a rhetorical point in the context of a discussion of the Rosh Hashana liturgy. Yitzchak, Ben Arama takes a very different approach in Exodus gate 46, when he is focused on this law directly where he emphasises mercy and says nothing or repulsive men and distraught young girls  

[iii] Exodus 21:8

[iv] Rashi on verse 8, BVigdo Bah, based on the Talmud Kiddushin 18b, Seforno

[v] See Aaronson, E,  האם-זה-מוסרי-שאדם-ימכור-את-ביתו-לאמה/ https://www.elami-elatzmi.co.il/האם-זה-מוסרי-שאדם-ימכור-את-ביתו-לאמה/

[vi] Rabbi Shimon Eddi

[vii] Maimonides, Yad Hachazaka, Hilchot Avadim, 4:8

[viii] Seforno on 21:7

[ix] Kiddushin 20a

[x] Maimonides, Yad Hachazaka, Hilchot Avadim, 4:2

[xi] See also Tosafot, Kiddushin 41a, Dibur Hamatchil Asur

[xii] Sefer Hachinuch mitzva 43

[xiii] Exodus 22:22 is just one example, Isaiah 58 is another among many