King David told his 12-year-old son,
Solomon, “I am going the way of all the land, to die, and you should be strong
and be a man[i]”.
What kind of man should you be?
You should follow the example of the
men you were named after.
Moshe Tuvia Stark, your great-grandfather
who was so loved that every time his grandchildren mentioned his name, their
whole faces lit up with pleasure.
My wife Shoshie
and I, grandparents, and teachers all get great pleasure from you. This is no
small matter, as we are taught: “Every person in whom people’s
spirit find pleasure, God is pleased with, but anyone that people are not
pleased with, God is also not pleased with[ii]”.
Mr. Stark was an example of the teaching
that; “In a place where there are no men, step up and be a man[iii]”.
He was ‘the man’ who took responsibility for the synagogue, two schools, meals
for those in need, the mikveh, and the burial society.
You are also named after your great,
great grandfather, Dr. Armin, Yirmiyahu Blau. A Torah scholar and a teacher. One
of his students wrote about him. “His depth of knowledge of German culture and his artistic interests
fascinated us and called on us to follow him. “Nobody instructed us better in the
noble art of being human.[iv]”
Great shoes to fill, but you are
already on your way to living up to their examples, thanks to the balanced
education you get at your school, Kesser Torah. But, as Reb Zushe said, it
is not our task to be a copy of anyone else. Certainly, not strong, and brutal like
Samson[v]. Instead,
we must strive to be the best version of ourselves[vi].
So, I return to the
question of what kind of man you will become?
I invite you to consider being the kind of man represented by a fictional, brave, young man, wise beyond his years.
I refer to the character called Hiccup, a young dragon rider[vii].
It is written: “who is strong, one who conquers his own inclination”[viii].
The kind of man you must be, is one who is able to tame the beast inside of you.
According to Hasidic teachings, the meaning of the sacrifices offered up in the temple, is to offer up the animals inside of us.
The ox represents the aggressive part of us[ix], that reacts harshly when provoked or irritated, when we feel that the other person is not being reasonable and deserves a harsh reaction.
It is ok to be assertive, but we must be calm and restrained.
The wrong kind of ox is represented by many of the 1980s New York City cops I remember who were in the habit of yelling insults at people who made a traffic mistake.
On the other hand, the harnessed ox is exemplified by the detective who stopped at a traffic light, next to a car full of Yeshiva students including me on Ocean Parkway in Brooklyn. He flashed a badge and in a very calm, soft voice told the driver “I have been watching your driving”, he listed all the things the driver did wrong. Then he said: “I am not a cop, I am not going to give you a ticket. You keep driving like this and I will take you into the station”. The driving dramatically improved.
But we also sacrifice sheep. This represents pleasure-seeking. A gentle sheep that does nothing but eat grass play on the computer and endlessly dribble a basketball.
Here is the odd thing about pleasure. In moderation, pleasure is good. All the sacrifices had to include salt[x] which adds flavour to food[xi]. I am proud of your basketball ability.
But we must not be driven by seeking pleasure. We must be in control.
The Torah states that yeast or honey was generally not allowed to be part of the sacrifices[xii]. We must not be motivated by the drive for pleasure represented by honey[xiii], but do what is right, because it is right[xiv].
The animal soul we have inside is wild and loves his pleasure. It can be incredibly productive and delightful which is great. Its passion can help us fly high and accomplish things we might never have imagined possible, but this only works if we direct it.
Tuvia, welcome to the dragon riders, young man.
[i]
Kings I 2:2
[ii]
Pirkey Avot 3:10
[iii]
Pirkey Avot 2:5
[iv] Wolfsberg,
Dr. O, Armin Published in Zion, vol 9, no. 3, pp. 13-14. July 1937. Berlin.
Translated from German to English by his daughter Rivka (Jenny) Marmorstein.http://www.geni.com/people/R-Dr-Armin-%D7%99%D7%A8%D7%9E%D7%99%D7%94%D7%95-Blau/353035782440006443
[v]
Lyrics to the 8th Day song
[vi] https://jewishjournal.com/commentary/blogs/336309/a-moment-in-time-why-were-you-not-more-like-zusia/
[vii] the
main protagonist of the DreamWorks’ animated How to Train Your Dragon
[viii]
Pirkey Avot 4:1
[ix] Likutei Torah, Vayikra
[x] Leviticus 2:13
[xi] Baal Shem Tov on the Torah
[xii] Leviticus 2:11
[xiii]
Sefer Hachinuch 117, referred to as “self-oriented satisfaction a person feels
in his divine service – based on Ohr Hatorah and Yahel Or in The Siddur
Illuminated with Chassidus, p. 39, Kehot publications
[xiv]
Maimonides, Mishneh Torah, Laws of
repentance 1:3
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